Although we know that the goal of networking is to discover new business opportunities, it’s more than a “paint by the numbers” process. It takes time, patience, and creativity to cultivate people into our lives. The key is to make networking become a natural part of everyday life.

When I first started consulting businesspeople, networking was starting to get a bad reputation. People saw trade shows, business seminars, and community events as “targets” to pass out and collect as many business cards as possible. Ultimately, people networked when they needed something from someone. I agree that type of attitude can be detrimental to our sales success.

To make positive networking become a part of your everyday life, start with a strategy and begin the process. Begin to imagine that many people you meet can lead you to potential business. Now think about how that strategy will include tactics to allow people to feel comfortable, trusting, and willing to want to help you achieve more. This idea takes some planning:


  1. First,

    know your contact. When someone is offering to help you meet other people, make sure you are not “using” them. When you call someone up and say, “Hi Bob. I need your help with some referrals. Any suggestions?” On the surface it seems harmless. However, people will sense when you’re using them as a means to and end. A better approach would be to have a genuine dialog first, then, at the right time, ask them if they would help you “brainstorm” for new ideas to develop new business. Sometimes your contacts will give you more than you hoped.


  2. Have a clear vision. Be sure that you can see the end results with all your contacts. For example, make sure your contacts get you close to the people you want to meet. When someone gives you the name of the sister, who knows the postal worker who delivers mail to your lead, then it’s going to take a while to get what you want. Contacts should get you as close as possible to the right leads.


  3. See the potential. Everyone we meet is either a client, prospect, friend, or knows someone who can help us meet one. Sometimes we think we have to go to the top, and may not realize the strength is in the foundation. Often, the top people rely on people they manage for advice. While the president of a company signs the biggest checks, you might want to find ways to let that person’s staff see how you can provide the products or service to help everyone at the company. Avoid taking people for granted; almost everyone could get you closer to new leads.


  4. Surround the account. In addition to knowing the people around potential clients, take time to network with decision makers in a variety of ways. Think of a combination of ways to influence people. This could include trade shows, business networking lunches, and civic group functions. The goal here is to impress upon the prospect that what interests them interests you. Remember, be genuine. If you don’t bowl, then forget about joining a league just to get near potential customers.


  5. Solid relationships endure. If you have ever followed the progress of new construction, you’ll find it takes some time to get the foundation in place. However, once that’s done, the rest of the building seems to go up in a relatively short period of time. That’s also true with networking relationships. Once you’ve determined the best way to network with new customers, then stick with it. For example, if there are monthly meetings, make sure you attend each one. If the contacts ask for some follow-up information, make sure you send it out.


  6. Follow up in unique ways. No, you don’t have to send singing telegrams. When you network with new people, work to remember something that is important to them. It could be something they collect, or may be something related to sports. Then, these topics can become a spring board for future communications. For example, if someone likes fishing, the follow-up note you send could have a fish on it. It doesn’t take much. However, it does take some thought. It’s this attention to detail that will strengthen your networking relationships. One way that I have generated over 50% of my business is from sending handwritten notes. According to the United States Postal Service, only 4% of the mail is personalized. This simple form of communication will get you remembered.

Here’s a game plan you might want to follow to help make networking a part of your life:


  • Each week call one person you haven’t spoken with for the past 90 days. Take nothing for granted; approach this person like a new networking contact, and do the follow up.
  • When you invite clients to accompany you to an event or a meal, offer them an extra “ticket” so that they can bring along a guest.
  • Write notes to people you’ve never worked with. For example, look at a trade publication, and write a note to someone featured in an article. Avoid making a pitch; just mention something that impressed you in the article.
  • Develop your own system. Think back to current clients you got through networking. Now remember the tactics that lead you to these customers. The goal here is to discover what you already do that works, and repeat it.


Start viewing the world as being one big network. Now plan on “plugging” into it to get the power that leads to more customers.


The New York Times and The Wall Street Journal have featured Ms. Nierenberg's networking expertise. She is a master at helping others build their communication skills to create stronger connections. Ms. Nierenberg is a networking authority who demonstrates how to balance today's high speed communications with effective interpersonal skills. This is accomplished through her outstanding keynote addresses, seminars, articles in national publications, and appearances on national television and radio programs. You can contact her at:

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