The longest relationship in life is between siblings. The relationship between siblings is developed long before friends are made, or encounters with a first girlfriend or boyfriend are established. Even a fifty year spousal relationship usually does not last as long as our kinship with our siblings. There are frequently more shared memories, and lessons learned in life from a sibling than any other single source of authority. When we are children, we learn from playing, socializing, and dealing with our sister or brothers. We also learn to experience the difficulties of interacting with others, communicating, negotiating, and manipulating, or being manipulated. All the principals of our siblings become a vital part of our identities, where we’ve come from, and who we are today. A Sibling’s coaching is ranked the most important in terms of learning.
Studies have shown that if a child has an older sister or brother who smokes, they are much more likely to smoke themselves. In fact, their risk factor is three to five times higher than a person who has an older sibling that does not smoke. This is also true of alcohol use. Statistics show that siblings have a much bigger influence than parents or friends. Since eighty-five percent of all people have at least one sibling who lives in the United States, perhaps prevention should be directed at the relationship between brothers and sisters. When a child reaches the age of ten or eleven years old, they’ve already spent at least a third of their time with a sibling, that’s more time spent with them than any other group of people in their lives.
During difficult times of death, divorce, jobless parent or parents, sibling gathers the wagons around each other. They help support and protect their immediate sibling group. A child, who is separated from his siblings by being sent to a different Foster Homes for example, may not be able to process the distress of the physical separation. The results of losing all communication with a brother or sister, or both can cause a life time of mourning. In the United States it is estimated that over five hundred thousand kids are in the Foster Care system, and approximate seventy-two percent of these kids have been alienated from their biological sibling.
As far as gender goes, brothers have more sibling rivalry, particularly if they are close in age. The behavior continues into adulthood, and can be seen more when their financial status in life is not the same. If one brother appears to be doing better than the other; such as a better job, there seems to be some discord between them. On the other hand rivalry occurs less often between a sister and brother.
First born children usually like to direct and guide their siblings; they also are geared towards both negative and positive social interactions. The second child is more flexible, likes to emulate the older sibling. There are also studies that showed that younger siblings are more apt to try new things or new places with their older brother or sister. On the other hand, compared to younger siblings, older siblings learned tasks at a slower rate.
There are many factors that influence our lives, but most often than not, it is a sibling that we share the familiar bond with for a lifetime. Younger siblings learn all kinds of lessons from older siblings, and are more sociable. There are also increase risk factors from negative behaviors of older sibling such as smoking. Rivalry tends to be a much longer problem, in male to male relationships, as oppose to male, female relationships. Birth order is a pretty interesting theory, but may not hold true for everyone.
About the Author:
Debbie has been writing online for a while and has a lot of different interests. Check out her websites at Folding Laundry Table and Laundry Folding Table.
