"I'd love to make some changes in my life, but I just can't get myself going." "There are lots of things I want to do, but by the time I finish all I have to do, I'm too tired to do what I want." These are common complaints that I hear from seminar participants, coaching clients, and even family and friends. Living and working in our fast-paced society often means that by the time we've finished what we "have" to do, we're too tired to gear up for other things that are important to a satisfying and successful life. We may want to take a painting class, read a good book, or join a gym, but we're too drained. We may know that our lives would be richer if we'd change jobs, end tumultuous relationships, or take better care of ourselves, but we simply don't have the spunk to pull off such a shift. Our heads say, "Go," but our feet say, "No."
How did we get into this state…too tired to engage in activities that would add joy and meaning to our lives? It's true that fate sometimes serves up a major energy drain such as divorce, loss, or a serious illness, but most of the time our lack of zest is far less dramatic. Over time, we inadvertently slip into beliefs and habits that rob us of clarity, resilience, and motivation. Soon we are working 24/7, ignoring a need to refuel or doing so only once a year on vacation. We wistfully talk of the days when we will have more time for ourselves…to stretch and relax and maybe give something back. But while we're waiting for someday, everyday stress plays havoc on our success, our health, and happiness. When there is no daily ebb and flow, we lose our balance. It's a simple accounting matter. If you expend more energy than you take in every day, you'll soon find yourself running on "empty."
So, what are we to do…too busy to take time out to refuel, but too burned out to pursue what we want? The answer lies in a whole new way of dealing with daily stress:
the quick-lift method. Before we can change our lives in any substantial way, we've got to change how we function each day. We can't manage stress, but we can manage our energy. As with any other precious resource…successful people pay attention to how they generate it, spend it, and replace it.
Over the last three years, I addressed this epidemic of low-energy with a column in my online newsletter by providing quick-lift energizers to stop stress in its tracks fast…in less time than it takes for a coffee break! The response to my newsletter "energizers" was quite astounding. At first, people couldn't believe that a brief activity of ten minutes or less could pay such big dividends, but renewed zip and an unstoppable attitude were proof enough. Clients, subscribers, and workshop participants reported new levels of energy, optimism, focus, and motivation. I truly believe that if we stop waiting until we have the time and start taking a few minutes every day to refuel, we not only become more effective at coping with life's daily stresses, but we also build the resilience necessary to move our careers and lives forward.
It is no secret that we need to take care of ourselves physically – with nutrition, rest, and exercise. Like automobiles, our bodies need such fuel to function effectively. But we also need emotional energy. You might feel as energized after a visit with a dear friend as you do after a good night's sleep. Conversely, you might feel more depleted after a spat with a spouse or being passed over for a promotion, than if you cleaned every room in the house or worked overtime all week. So while it is certainly prudent to manage our diet and exercise, we should not neglect another important factor that adds zest to life: the management of our emotional energy.
Every day we face situations that can drain us emotionally, lowering our motivation and inspiration. Calling upon my work with clients over the past twenty years and research for my new book, Recharge in Minutes, I have developed the quick-lift method to reversing ten common low-energy states – from mental overload to mind-numbing boredom; from bouts of self-doubt to fear of moving forward; from being annoyed with people to being hungry for connection – and ten ways to reverse each one. You don't have to turn your life upside down to find more zip. Just stop once or twice a day and consciously shift your energy from outbound to in. Make a habit of taking a refueling break at the same time every day, or use the quick-lift method whenever you sense your energy is getting low.
For example, you might start each day with what I call "Morning Intent" -instead of jumping out of bed each day focusing only on what you should and have to do, try focusing on these questions: What kind of person do I want to be today? What 3 things do I really want to accomplish? How can I make a difference in someone's life today? If you suffer from a mind in overdrive, you'll find clearer focus when you start practicing morning intent. And at the end of the day, try a reinforcing quick-lift. Instead of focusing on all the things that you didn't get done and all of the times that you slipped up, try "Evening Acknowledgement" where you focus on your day's accomplishments. What were the moments in the day when you were the person you aspire to be? What progress did you make on your three priorities? Where did you make a difference in someone's life? To end your day by acknowledging your successes fills you up and gives you fuel to tackle tomorrow. If you get criticized, or make a big mistake, stop for five minutes and see if there is any "gift" in the challenge. A lesson? A warning? If you're frazzled from focusing on a problem, take a breathing break: close your door, take slow deep breaths, and let the stress roll off your shoulders. Or go for a walk, look out the window, or stop and connect with someone you care about. I could list 100 ways to rev up your day, but you can do anything that puts the brakes on the downward slide to feeling overwhelmed, under appreciated, or unable to cope. The important thing is not to let the fight-flight reaction take over. Use quick-lifts to reverse direction fast! It's not the big things that get in the way of your success; it's the chronic everyday stress. So, don't wait for vacation to take a break; start mastering the quick-lift method to enhance your focus, confidence, and energy on a daily basis. Soon, you'll be master of the bounce-back factor and primed for achieving what you want at work and in life.
Suzanne Zoglio, Ph.D. is a life-balance expert, national speaker, and author of
Recharge in Minutes: The Quick-Lift Way to Less Stress, More Success, and Renewed Energy, as well as Create A Life That Tickles Your Soul (named "Outstanding Book of the Year" in the Independent Publisher Book Awards 2000). www.zoglio.com.
